I’ll give you my opinion as someone who definitely wants a ring, and a diamond, but wants to be reasonable. Sorry, I don’t want a “spaghetti ring.” I don’t wear rings normally so I do want the two rings I will wear every day (engagement + wedding ring) to be really pretty. Yes, I like sparkly and gorgeous rings, but it comes down to the style not the money spent (although they can be intertwined). I hate rings that consist of a band and a huge, honking diamond… it looks awkward. On the flip side when I see the rings of friends from high school that got married when they were 20, their head-of-a-pin sized diamonds look a little bit sad in their gold band setting. I think the key is talking to your fiancee and getting something reasonable based on the look she likes. The rings I have browsed through and picked out based on their style and look have been a lot cheaper than what my guy has picked out (I think he was choosing based on his price point). I don’t need the price tag. I care more about the style (shape of the stone, color of the band, the setting I like) than what he spent; if it looks good, it looks good. If he couldn’t afford anything over $500 and it turned out that I wanted something a little more expensive, since I am wearing it every day for the rest of my life I am happy to help pay for it. I don’t say that to be emasculating, but I would hope he’d understand that I want to like the style of the ring I wear every day. I also do NOT want him to spend a ridiculous amount of money on a ring. I am a saver and pay off my credit cards in full every month, have no unpaid loans on anything, and have a lot put away in a 401k, emergency fund, and investment account. If he thought he should blow all his money on one big purchase and put himself in debt, he would not be the guy for me. I am content knowing that the rings I have looked at are a reasonable enough price (either for him or for me and him to pay off together), so I am not worried. Not sure if the style I like happens to fit in my budget, or because of my natural saving tendencies, I have started liking the rings that fit in my budget( I make 80k but the rings I like are definitely less than 2 months of my salary). Is that reasonable enough for you guys?
After reading this I thought I should say this, I am 27 years old and today I went out and spent $9700 on a 1.31 carat stone with a costume made setting. It took me 15 min of looking threw stones to choose the one I did. As I walked outside a big smile came over my face just thinking of how she will react when I give it to her. First of a ring is an investment being scared to wear your ring is just dumb to me rings can always get insured. Second how can some people say CZ or Lab made diamonds are perfectly OK? do you really think it is appropriate to start of your lives together on something fake? and would you really feel good to receive compliments knowing its not real? Buying the love of your life a nice rock is the right thing to do, this is the person you will spend the rest of her life with you. I love knowing that every time she looks at her ring or receives a compliment that she will fell good and that makes me feel go and you can’t put a price n that. I am in no way rich or make cray money but it makes perfect sense to me to splurge on a loved one and all of you people who says they really don’t care I say your full of crap…… P.S. Estate/antique/vintage rings are USED rings and its bad luck to wear someone else s ring.
Shop with the assumption that you’ll spend about 3 percent of your total wedding budget on the rings. Depending on the retailer, a plain, 14-karat gold or simple platinum band can cost around $1,000. Embellishments, like diamonds or engraving, will quickly add to the cost, so factor that into your budget if you plan to personalize your rings with any of these extras. The price of engraving is usually based on the number of characters, the font used and whether it’s engraved by hand or machine (hand is usually pricier).
I made it clear to my boyfriend that I am not concerned about the price of the ring, so as long as it’s something I can wear everyday, won’t hurt my students (i’m constantly holding tiny hands), and will last a long time. Sure enough, he spent an evening looking at rings online and kept calling me over to look at different rings (while covering the price with his hand haha). I am on the same page as everyone else about the ring not being essential but I can’t help wanting the world to know that I’m engaged. It’s exciting! (:
My sweetheart and I just had this conversation (hence the web browsing). He wanted some reassurance that we are on the same page and he wouldn’t be buying a ring I would refuse, but he wants it to be a surprise. So, although I’m a bit of traditionalist and like the idea of him being in suspense, I don’t want to cause him unnecessary stress. I told him I would/will say yes if he asks me and we came up with the idea for me to send him pictures of rings I like. Being the nerd I am (and he is too), I put together an Excel spreadsheet with different tabs for engagement rings, wedding bands, and ring sets with the clear message that the images are meant as a guide, not as expectations. I also made sure he knew that while I love pretty sparkly things, I don’t equate his love and commitment with his financial investment and I made sure to include images across a range of budgets. This way it’s a surprise for me, but he knows what I like.
If you prefer to be surprised by the engagement ring, this may not work, but knowing what bands go with the engagement ring can help you make a decision. For example, if you have a unique engagement ring, you may want a simple, no-fuss band, whereas a simple engagement ring may call for the added sparkle of a diamond pavé band. Also think about how the rings fit together. If you’re planning on wearing your engagement and wedding ring side by side, 24/7, look for a contour or shadow band designed to interlock with the matching engagement ring. If you’re planning on wearing your wedding ring alone, you may want a more intricate style that will look great with or without your engagement ring. Talk to your jeweler about finding a band that works with your ring (some can even create both at the same time).
My husband paid a little over 100 dollars for my engagement and was I offended? NO. He took time to decide on which ring to pick. He said he saw the ring HE liked and it was over $1000 but he had a feeling I wouldn’t like it which he was right. He showed me the ring he liked …. and it was too flashy for me. I am a teacher, a tutorial center coordinator and a faculty senate rep which I am extremely busy all day and a simple ring was perfect for me. My husband knew me well and he got what he knew I’d actually like. Simple rings happen to be a little cheaper… lucky for him… but that’s what I liked and wanted. An expensive ring does not (and should not) represent the amount of love my husband has for me. That’s ridiculous to me. My husband does a lot of things for me. He cooks, cleans, folds clothes, massages my feet, rubs my back, washes my hair, paints my toenails and so on. I like nice things, yes, but I am not superficial nor materialistic. If you guys like expensive rings then that is your business.
I’m shaking my head in discontent as I read through some of these comments. As a 22 year old single woman, I understand the desire to plan a lavish and meaningful, well-thought out wedding. Just like many others, I’ve dreamed of a beautiful wedding day my entire life. With that, comes an engagement ring. I would hope that you have all understood what cost goes into a ring. I’m not talking about how much your man should be expected to pay, but rather, what the ring has cost prior to ever being placed on your finger. The blood diamond trade is ravishing right now and it is nearly impossible to tell what is coming from where by the time it even gets placed in a jewelers hands. I couldn’t stomach having a symbol of broken families, tortured humans and death on my finger. Nothing about that screams “WAHOO, I’M GETTING MARRIED!!” to me. To be honest, the circle is what is most important. It’s the sign of eternity… a never ending circle, which is what marriage is meant to be after all. It’s a promise, unending, as well as a reminder of the vows you take to love and cherish one another (not a piece of jewelry. It’s not about the wedding… it’s about the marriage. Plenty of beautiful gem stones can be set in recycled golds, cutting down on support of the blood trade as well as refinery and pollution. If we don’t stop arguing for our selfishness, we’re never going to get anywhere as a human race. It’s time to start thinking about the importance in everything instead of the importance of things.